Little black book

I feel like a gentleman back in the days that women didn't put out before they were married; I found a guy who I really like, but I can't "lay" him just yet, and I respect him too much to just call him for sex, I have not had sex for 3 months now, and that's the longest I've ever gone without. So I'm getting a little frisky and my little text messaging fingers are getting "the itch" to send a message to someone whom I don't mind just "using".

I know this is bad, and while trying not to justify it, I do think it's better to give into a craving than to just ignore it and let it get worse. I'm not leading these men on and they know exactly what it is. I may be seeing Hugh this weekend, but that's not for sure, and even if it was, I don't expect anything.

So the first guy I send a message to, the boy I lost my virginity to, is busy with work and can't tonight.

The second is out of credit (I assume, or else he'd be right onto me); He never responded, and I really didn't expect it, it was just too easy to shoot one his way to see what happened. He and I dated a long while ago, and while it was ancient history we did end up in bed together later on, and from memory, it was good.

The third, a boy I've only met twice but have been wanting so very badly since we first met, does not have a car - I just found out - it almost killed me. He did want to take me home at some point though, I couldn't that night. Nothing has ever really happened with him as I was a little uncomfortable about having sex in the park like he wanted to, in front of the drunks and all.

So I am immensely sexually frustrated and in need of someone else's skin on mine.

Part of me is happy though, if Hugh and I do get together in the end, at least I can say I didn't have sex with anyone when we were "getting together" as it were.

Love, Peace &Respect
Stacey